The Valley

"Let every valley be lifted up and every mountain and hill be made low; and let the rough ground become a plain and the rugged terrain a broad valley." Isaiah 40:4

It's funny how the view from the Valley's in life provide a different viewpoint. In the Valley, everything seems much much bigger and blown out of porportion. We can't see what's over the mountain that looms above us, but we can take comfort in the fact that God can see what's over that mountain. I'm not one to display all of my emotions over something so public, usually that's my sister Kisha. haha..jk Kisha. But a very wise lady known as my grandmother, told me over Memorial weekend that it's not good to keep things inside. As a result while I was at my grandmother's house I had a dream that really shook me. I'll post the dream and then I'll tell you my uncle's anaylsis.

In my dream I'm a bull, don't laugh. :). In my dream I'm confronted with this huge mountain, and as a bull it's even bigger and just seems to tower so high above me. It's also really really wide. As this bull, I'm using my head and I'm doing my very best to move this mountain, but it's absolutely refusing to budge. I get maybe a couple of inches, barely even inches and then it won't move anymore.

My uncle Stephen's analysis of this dream was that the bull represents an emotion: anger.
He said that the mountain represents an obstacle that I'm trying to overcome and I'm angry about this "mountain". Afterward, I went back to the bedroom I was sleeping in and thought about the dream and his intrepretation. It seemed like it was right on because one of the reasons why I went home was I needed to go out to the house before it was sold. My mom told me that the deal was going to be done Wednesday, and I was there til Monday. The next day, I go out to the house and it hurt. Seeing everything empty, the place where I spent many years of my childhood growing up. I made my way through the rooms, all the memories clouding in and ghosts occupying the room so that it played like a movie in my mind. I visualized where everything was suppose to be, and eventually I made it to my bedroom. This hurt the worst. Everything was gone, nothing was left behind. I went to the place where my bed was, sat on the floor and sobbed like a baby. The whole time my mom was trying to sell the house it felt surrel. I didn't believe that it was actually going to happen, that my home was no longer going to be my home. While a million thoughts were going through my mind a verse popped into all the chaos.

"Foxes have holes and the birds of the air have lodging places, but the Son of Man has nowhere to lay His head." Matthew 8:20

I immediately regretted my little pity party. In my last post I said that things happen for a reason, and that I have to believe that. I still stand by that statement. When it seems that Satan keeps throwing curve balls your way, it's got to make you think, I'm doing something right. If he's trying to kick me off course that means I'm headed in the right direction. I left my home that day with mixed feelings. I finally got my sense of "closure". I would like to say that I feel better after that day, but in fact I still dream about home. I'm going to miss it so much. Even now when I stumble across a picture at the house I tear up. It's going to take some time to heal these wounds...time. But I do know that time is nothing to my God. He created it. That gives me comfort.

In the morning, when I rise
In the morning, when I rise
In the morning, when I rise
Give me Jesus.
You can have all this world,
Just give me Jesus.

When I am alone,
When I am alone,
When I am alone,
Give me Jesus.
You can have all this world,
Just give me Jesus.

When I come to die,
When I come to die,
When I come to die,
Give me Jesus.
You can have all this world,
Just give me Jesus.

Give me Jesus.
You can have all this world,
Just give me Jesus.